Kangana

Recently, my nephew got married. We welcomed the new bride to our home with all the Hindu rituals.

‘Kangana’ is one of the most popular and much-awaited ritual. It is a match between the couple to locate the boy’s wedding ring from amongst a platter filled with water, milk, turmeric, a silver coin, a bunch of grass and the kanganas of both the bride and the groom. It takes place 7 times and whosoever has the highest count wins.

It may sound like a match but actually it helps the couple discover a sense of unity. Marriage is all about dissolving the ‘you’ and ‘me’ to create a ‘we.’ Our elders have created these rituals to pass on the wisdom and the real purpose behind creating the institution of marriage. What better way to pass the knowledge to the posterity than creating rituals!

The game is a win-win situation. Your partner’s win brings the same, and for some, more joy than their own win. Thus, it is not at all about winning or losing. It is about feeling that your life is now connected to this person’s and in this relationship, the ‘you’ can very comfortably be replaced by the ‘I’ and vice-versa. The ‘we’ moves ahead to bring to life more ‘I’s.’ you change from inside and this is the first step to bring about that realization.

I thought, “We are all cheering them up for the win but to them, does it really matter?

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